Shatner Snubs Jared! Let the Franchise Feud Begin!
(Franchise Pick, the leading trashy franchise Internet rag!) One of my many, many groupies and adoring fans, Brown Betty, wrote:
…no offense, Sean/Admin, you do make some absolutely off the wall statements, but I guess that’s just part of the game you play as you skyrocket to fame and fortune with this trashy Franchise Internet Rag.
Brown Betty was referring to my Unhappy Franchisee blog, but FranchisePick.com has had just as much to do with my meteoric rise “to fame and fortune.” (The “absolutely off the wall statements” Brown Betty was reacting to was my suggestion that it was not nice for the founders of Cuppy’s Coffee to take hundreds of thousands dollars in franchise fees from people and not give it back. Wacky, huh?). But Betty did hit a nerve… one that has been a bit sensitive ever since I learned that Ryan Seacrest makes approximately $7 Million more per year than I do.
Sure, I’ve got incredible fame, but I could really use more in the Fortune department. Betty inspired me to try to live up to the “trashy Franchise Internet Rag” moniker she gave me. From now on, my motto is “WWRH?” or What Would Ryan Hype?
It didn’t take me long to find a ferocious franchise feud in the making. It turns out Saturday Night Live flew William Shatner to New York at 3 am to be in a sketch with Barack Obama and Michael Phelps. When he got there, the portly Shatner found they had replaced the sketch with one of him and the ex-portly Subway spokesman Jared. In this seething video, Captain Kirk tells how he refused to lower himself to play sidekick to a sandwich salesboy… especially one holding a pair of pants stolen from Shatner’s dressing room.
If Jared will only fire back an angry response with a reference to Shatner’s weight, I’ll have started the biggest celebrity feud since George Takei left Shatner off the guest list of his same-sex wedding. My rise “to fame and fortune with this trashy Franchise Internet Rag” will be off to a roaring start!
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